The Top Secret Notes of The Golden Trio
by typicalgryffinclaw
Summary: Just a silly ‘lil fic I made about the Trio's notes in class. Because I seriously love the Golden Trio. DISCLAIMER: I OWN NOTHING!
1. Potions with Potter, 'Mione and Ronald

**Lil' Note: _Sooooo, fellow witches, wizards, demigods and the like! Wassup? Just a little reminder, there are two owners of this account so_ _please respect_** _ **both of them!**_

 _

 **This'll be about The Golden Trio's notes in class!**

 **I (one of the acc owners, obviously) am not one of the best writers, so please don't judge!**

 **I own nothing! All rights go to JK Rowling and Warner Bros!**

 **Hope y'all enjoy!**

 **xxxgryffinclawxxx ️**

ALWAYS - UNTIL THE VERY END - ALWAYS (that's my line break)

 **Code:**

 **Bold is Harry**

Underlined is Ron

Normal Text is Hermione

ALWAYS - UNTIL THE VERY END - ALWAYS

 **Ron?**

 **Ron?**

 **Roooonnn??**

 **Rooooooooooonnnnnn???**

 **ROOOOOOOOOOOONNNNN?????**

Haaaaaaaaaaarrrrrryyyyy???

Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrryyyy! Ohhhhhhhhh, Harrrrrrryyyyyyy, I'm dyyyyyyyiiiiinnngggg! Oooohhhhhhh, Harrrrrrryyyyy!!!!

 **Heeeelllpppp!! Snape is looking at me...**

Tell him to sod off.

 **But he wants to kill me! I can't tell my future killer to sod off, Ron!**

Who doesn't want to kill you these days?

 **You?**

I want to kill you for bloody throwing this parchment at my head!

 **It's just parchment.**

Well, parchment hurts!

 **Drama queen!**

Ruthless parchment thrower!

 **Idiot.**

Heeeeyyy! I'm offended!

 **Geez.**

Hmph!

 **...Fine then. Hermione? She won't kill me, I guess?**

She wants to kill you because you didn't do your Potions essay, remember?

 **Fine...Seamus!**

Nah, he's sick of you.

 **Oi!**

It's true.

 **You betrayed me!**

I didn't betray you, I just said Seamus was sick of you, that's all.

 **Traitor.**

Am not!

 **Are too!**

Am not!

 **Are too.**

Am not.

 **Are too.**

Am not.

 **Are too.**

Am not.

 **Are too.**

AM. NOT.

 **Prove it, Weasley.**

How, Potty?

 **Yell it.**

 **Yell it.**

 **Yell it!**

30 seconds later... (no, this ain't Hemione)

YOU IDIOTS! (this is Hermione)

 **What's up, 'Mione?**

Your stupidity level is rising up, that's what. And my tolerance level of idiots like YOU TWO is falling considerably!

Buuurrnnn!

I mean you too, Ron!

 **Buuurrnnn!**

So I'm the traitor now, Potty?

 **Um, yeah! You agreed with my burn! Not cool, mate!**

SHUT UP!

 **It's paper, 'Mione, we can't shut up.**

Yeah, sorry 'Mione, but it's your problem, not ours.

It'll be "your problem" once I tell Snape you're passing notes in class!

 ***gasp* ... You wouldn't!**

... You couldn't...

 **Nooo...**

Nooo...

 **Whyyyy...**

I can out-dot you, Potter!

 **No, you -**

Yes, I can...

 **Dun, dun, duuuuunnnn!**

I'm raising my hand in 3 -

 **Noooo!**

\- 2 -

Noooo!

\- 1 -

 **Noooooo! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Have mercy, 'Mione, have mercy!**

Pleaaassseee!

 **Noooo!**

Noooo!

FINE!

I knew it, 'Mione, you looooovvvee us too much!

Don't tempt me, Ronald.

Sorry, my dearest 'Mione.

And don't call me "'Mione", Ronald! It's hardly proper!

Don't call me "Ronald", then!

Fine!

Fine!

 **Ooooohh, are little 'Mione and Ronald having an argument? Where's the popcorn?**

Harry!

Harry!

Get out of this!

Thank you, 'Mione!

Shut up, Ronald!

 **You're having an argument over names, for Merlin's sake!**

SHUT -

\- UP!

 **'Kay, fine! I'm leaving! I'm going where I am wanted... where I am not abandoned... *sniff***

You're good at making people shut up on paper, Hermione.

Thank you, Ron.

 **Oooohhhh!!**

... um, I...

...uhhhhh -

HARRY JAMES POTTER, GO AWAY!

 **Sooo, did you like this fic? Hope you did, I worked on it for quite a while. AnyWHO, PLEAAAAAAASSSSEEEEE review and tell me what you liked and disliked about my fic!**

 **Peace out!**

_


	2. Charms is a CHALLENGE, RON!

**Disclaimer: If Harry Potter was owned by me, Fred would be alive, Neville would've married Luna, Umbridge would be dead, and Harry would've named Albus Severus 'Albus Arthur Potter' or 'Remus Rebeus Potter'. Summary: I DO NOT OWN HARRY POTTER, JK ROWLING (THE HARRY POTTER QUEEN) DOES!**

 **Key:**

 **Bold is Harry**

Underlined is Ron

Normal Text is Hermione

ALWAYS - UNTIL THE VERY END - ALWAYS

 **Ron?**

Yesssss??

 **Lavender is looking at me weirdly.**

First Snape, now Lavender. Who's next on your 'future killers' list?

 **Hermione, remember?**

She was always on your future killers list.

 **It was only a few essays I forgot to do, not a lot!**

Anyway, what did you do to make Lavender murderous?

 **She's not looking at me like she wants kill me.**

Then how else is she looking at you?

 **I think . . .**

You think?

 **She's sort of twirling her hair . . .**

And?

 **She's sort of got a dreamy look in her eyes . . .**

And?

 **She's sort of . . .**

Sort of what?

 **RON.**

Super Ron is here!

 **SHE JUST BLEW ME A KISS.**

WHAT?

 **AND...**

WHAT?

 ***GULPS*. . . GIGGLED.**

No!

 **Yes!**

No!

 **She did!**

But what can that mean?

Dear Merlin . . .

 **HERMIONE!**

You called?

 **Help!**

. . . I'm glad to be of service?

 **It's Lavender!**

What about her?

 **SHE BLEW ME A KISS!**

She blew you a . . . WHAT?!

 **A . . . A KISS!**

Oh dear.

 **What — "oh dear!"**

I don't think this is good.

 **WHAT?**

I said that this isn't good.

No, you WROTE it.

Lay off, Ronald.

Jeez, fine! I'm just trying to help my friend in crisis mode!

Crisis mode?! She just blew a _kiss!_

 **It IS crisis mode! I'm about to hyperventilate!**

Calm down.

 **I WILL NOT! I AM ABOUT TO CRY!**

You little baby.

It's not _funny,_ Ron!

Oi! You were the one telling him to "calm down!"

I didn't know he would need to be medically tranquil!

He would be — what?

Urgh! Isn't it obvious, Ronald? He needs a Calming Draught.

We don't have a Calming Draught.

Congratulations, you figured it out.

It was just a darn air kiss!

 **IT WAS NOT! SHE GIGGLED! AND — AND WINKED!**

She winked?

 **YES!**

What's wrong with winking?

 **WHAT IF SHE _LIKES_ ME???!!!!**

I like you, you're my best friend.

He means the snogging-way, Ronald.

Ewwww! I don't like you then!

 **Well, thanks, Ron!**

I meant in the snogging-way!

 **I DON'T CARE WHICH WAY YOU MEANT! I JUST WANT TO GET OUT OF A TEN-METER RADIUS OF THAT LOVESICK STALKER!**

You're being quite melodramatic, Harry. Lavender isn't a stalker.

Yeah, stalking requires you to see the stalkee, and if Lavender winked she had one eye closed. That means she couldn't see you for a few seconds.

. . . Very strange, but all right, Ronald . . .

 **THAT'S _IT!_**

 _( 30 seconds later . . .)_

. . . Did Harry actually just leave the Charms classroom?

What do you think?

Bloody hell!

How rude and disrespectful!

Jeez, sorry, it was just a _word!_

No, I mean walking out of the classroom!

I'd have done it!

RONALD!

What?

I cannot believe you!

Yes, you can.

Oh . . . I guess I can . .

Charms is too haaaaarrrrdddd!

It is not!

Is too!

Is not!

Is too!

Is not!

Is too!

It is not!

That's because you're Hermione!

I don't know whether to be offended or flattered.

Er . . . let's go with "flattered" for my sake and yours.

Charms is a CHALLENGE, RON! Challenges are good!

Fine, fine.

It is! Well, they are!

Right. I know. It is.

I'm not satisfied.

Since when have you been?

Hmph! Charms is a CHALLENGE, RON!

Yeah, it sure is for Harry, the poor guy, with winking girls everywhere.

I am so done with you, Ron!

You're not serious.

Oh dang, you are.

 **So, how'd you like it? This took a while.**

 **Please RR, and please tell me what you liked and disliked about this chapter, as it would help me out a lot!**

 **Peace out.**


	3. History of Boringness

**Wassup? Yup, I'm back :) Please let me know what you think of this chapter, as I am looking for constructive criticism, and it really would mean a lot to me. I was thrilled when four people put this fanfic in their favourites, and over the moon when three people followed it! Without further ado, I present this chapter!**

Harry?

Harry?

Harry?

HARRY?

 **WHAT, RON?**

I just wanted to know why you're crying.

 **Crying? I am not crying!**

Yes, you are. Ginny always looks like that when she's about to cry.

 **That's _Ginny._**

So?

 **She's a girl!**

Your point?

 **Girls have different feelings. They're a different species of human all together!**

Mmm . . . solid point.

 **Told you!**

So what's bothering you?

 **Nothing's bothering me.**

Yes, there's something bothering you.

 **No, there's not.**

Trust me, young one; there _is._

 **How would you know, Ron? And I'm not young!**

Yes, you are.

 **That's not fair! It's only a few months!**

Ha! Still older!

 **Fine then. And don't avoid my question!**

I'm not avoiding your question. And I know because I'm just naturally a genius.

 **Ugh.**

"Ugh", indeed.

 **I'm going to talk to Hermione.**

She'll rip your head off.

 **But I need to talk to her about something.**

Like what? Where Sir Centaur IV was born?

 **No! I would never ask about History of Boringness.**

"History of Boringness"? Mate, you're a genius!

 **I know, old one, I know.**

Don't call me "old one".

 **Don't call me "young one".**

Ugh.

 **"Ugh", indeed.**

I'll just watch Hermione rip your head off.

 **You cruel monster.**

It's quality entertainment.

 **Here goes nothing!**

 **Aaaand: did you enjoy that chapter? You probably didn't because it was rushed—oops. I'd appreciate reviews, because I'm not sure what I'm doing wrong or right. Please just tell me what you liked and disliked, and I'll be satisfied.**


	4. Ft: Paranoid Harry

**Sorry! I haven't updated this in _so long!_ Forgive me, readers, forgive me. Also, quick PSA: this is set in OOTP!**

OOO

So, Harry ...

 **Yes, Ron?**

What did you say? 

**Say?**

Yes, you lousy git! What did you say? 

**To who?**

To Hermione, of course.

 **I asked her about the Occlumency lessons.**

And?

 **I said that I thought Snape was trying to invade my mind.**

Technically he is.

 **I _know!_ But guess what Hermione said!**

I don't know.

 **Just guess!**

She's Hermione. She probably said, "Harry, that's not possible. The library says so. Listen to my book!"

 **Hmm ... she didn't say that.**

Just tell me.

 **Fine. But only because you're so _forceful!_**

Geez, Potter. Thought you could handle a little pressure.

 **I can!**

Just yesterday you walked out of the room when Hermione said, "HARRY, ARE YOU PRACTICING OCCLUMENCY YET?"

 **She didn't say it. She _yelled it._**

Whatever. Same thing.

 **It is not! Hermione Granger has shattered my eardrums!**

Your eardrums? What about mine?

 **Yours are damaged. Mine are shattered.**

Drama queen!

 **Ahem.**

Drama _king._

 _ **AHEM.**_

Drama person.

 **I will shove this in McGonagall's face and tell her you're not listening.**

You wouldn't!

 **I would!**

Wouldn't!

 **Would!**

Wouldn't.

 **Would.**

WOULDN'T.

 **WOULD.**

YOU WOULDN'T!!

 **You're right. I wouldn't.**

See? I'm a genius! I predicted the future!

 **Like Trelawney.**

Yessss, Harry dear. Trelawney. You have the Grimmmmm!

 **You're writing. You can't do her voice.**

Watch me.

 **I am.**

Can you hear me?

 **I think so. Make yourself louder.**

Okay.

 _(A couple moments later ...)_

What on Earth was that noise?

 **Hello, Hermione. Ron was just impersonating Trelawney.**

I was.

May I ask why?

Yes.

All right: why?

Never said we'd answer.

You two are by far the most annoying humans on this planet!

 **Thanks, Hermione. You're great at cheering people up.**

You don't _need_ any cheering up! Just because you think Professor Snape is trying to invade your mind _doesn't mean_ that you're correct! You are just being paranoid!

 **Geez, Hermione. Sorry for being "paranoid."**

I didn't say anything about that.

It's not saying, it's writing.

I didn't write anything about that.

 **Nobody ever said you did.**

Just being cautious.

Ugh! You idiots!

Hey!

 **I second that!**

I'm leaving.

It's paper. You can't leave paper. It's called littering.

Shut up, Ronald.

 **Did Hermione just get outsmarted by Ron? Once in a blue moon, they say!**

Hey! And also: I can't shut up on paper.

 **Outsmarted twice?**

Both of you, stop. I am leaving this discourse for good.

Leaving this ... what??

 **That strike of brilliance didn't last long.**

Excuse me?!

 **You're excused.**

OOO

Author's note:

So that was the end of this chapter. If you liked it, please be sure to let me know, either by giving it a review (I promise it'll only take one or two minutes maximum. You can say something as simple as "This was good! I liked it!" and/or "Just work on your grammar.") or maybe giving it a follow or a favourite. If you didn't like it, that's perfectly fine. I'm okay with that. You can write a hate comment if you wish. Also: I changed my username. It is now **typicalgryffinclaw.**

Yours in bookishness,

typicalgryffinclaw


End file.
